Just not feeling it...

After a weekend of traveling, great exercise, and eating out way too much. My body has just wanted to shut down this week. I know eating out is a big culprit. I am trying to find a balance to get back to eating the way I do normally, but it seems nothing is helping. I know that gluten is almost always ingested when eating out. That is why I usually only eat out once a week for girls night and its usually at a safe place. I ate out 3 times in 3 days, at not so safe places. My stomach feels awful and sore.

3 days of not working out and just wanting to sleep the morning away, I finally got up and did 30 minutes on the elliptical today. I had hoped for more, but the way I am feeling, that was all I could do.

I get really bloated and gain weight when this happens. Not to mention feeling major fatigue, headaches, forgetfulness and anger. I will remember this week for a long time. I have not braved food out like that in a long time (so long I didn't remember) and hope to remember what I feel like and not do it again. Not to mention its expensive!

Today is a new day and I am going to concentrate on getting back to basics. Only raw food items. No processed and minimal veggies.

Exercise: Elliptical
Time: 30 minutes
Distance: .93 miles
Calories: 403
Calories:

On the road

This week I am working as a reserve flight attendant. Please forgive the picture, it was taken with my blackberry. I am gone from home for 6 days this trip. Which the Beanie does not like at all. Yes, that is a satin pillow she is sleeping on.


I pack a lot of my own food, which includes protein bars, and gluten free snacks. I look at my schedule and decide what I am going to eat each day. I write a little letter of the week so I know what day to eat it on and I don't consume another days food on accident.

Then I try to eat as many fruits and veggies as possible. When I go out to eat I usually order a steak. The hotels usually have some sort of fruit for breakfast and if we go out I always order a double side of steamed veggies, no seasoning.

I stay in a new, I should say different not necessarily new... hotel every night. Some have microwaves and refrigerators, some do not. Monday nights hotel in Salt Lake City, I will not mention because I had to have them change the sheets, and it was just a dirty room. This was my view from the balcony though. The mountains are so close they are amazing.

This is our plane at the airport in Salt Lake City, check out the mountains, it had just started to snow as we were getting ready to leave. The snow flakes were huge. I have not seen snow in so long I can not even remember when or where.

Today's hotel is much better.We are staying at the Hilton Garden Inn, in Burlington, MA. This was the scene when we arrived. It was cold and windy and rainy!

The hotel is equipped with everything one could need.


Not only are the rooms equipped with microwaves and refrigerators, it also has an in room coffee pot, so after getting in at 3am I did not have to go down and get breakfast to get coffee.

If you are a Hilton Honors member you receive water upon checking in. You can also receive complementary breakfast, if you are a platinum or diamond member, which I am not yet, but the other people in my crew are and have offered to take me as their guest to breakfast. Which, I did not take them up on this morning, because like I mentioned earlier, I got in at 3am. The apples picture below are from the front desk this morning. Which I will probably save for later.


Last night, or early this morning I should say, after I checked in I snagged an orange and had that for a late breakfast.

I had lunch plans with a friend that lives here, but he could not get out of a meeting, so we are supposed to do dinner. So for lunch I decided on popcorn (brought from home) because I am not really that hungry, even though I ate the whole bag.

I did not workout in the fitness center today. Just too tired after such a long day yesterday. I am off to take a nap before my dinner with an old friend, then I will be off to Toronto tonight.

Dinner with my little love

Tonight I had dinner with my little love tonight, she ate kibbles, and I made a green monster which contained 2 cups of spinach, 1 banana, and 1 cup almond milk. I also made Micro-Bakers Yam with cinnamon and butter. YuM!

Dinner By The Computer

Tonight dinner was had by the computer because I had work to do. I made a gluten-free brown rice tortilla with black beans with some shredded cheese and a side of salsa. To drink I had skim milk.

Driving to Tucson

Today I drove to Tucson for my cousin's bridal shower. Before I left I made a green monster for the road!
It contained:

3 cups of baby spinach
1 cup of blueberries
1 cup almond milk
2 Tbsp ground flax seed
1 small packet of chocolate rice protein powder


Rice protein powder is not my favorite, but it tasted pretty good.

It was super rainy, but I was careful.

The shower was really nice, the bridal shower that is. The rain was refreshing too.

Healthy Snacks!

This I ate a very healthy snack... more like breakfast was a Dr. Pepper and Gluten-Free Brownies. Since making brownies with gluten... for the <3 for Valentine's Day I had been craving them! So last night I made some and today I ate some!

For dinner I used the other half of my delicious spaghetti squash. I topped it with Classico Tomato Basil and grated parmesan.


I had a small caesar to go along with my spaghetti, which consisted of romaine lettuce, Newmans Caesar dressing, bacon bits, shredded parmesan, and fresh squeezed lemons. Yummy! I could eat this everyday!

Spaghetti Squash

Tonight for dinner I made spaghetti squash with mixed veggies. I learned how to make spaghetti squash on my own. There is a sticker on the squash when you buy it, I tried to follow them, but they were difficult and the squash was too hard to cut prior to cooking. So here are my directions.

1.) Wash squash
2.) Wrap in cling wrap
3.) Stab a few holes in the squash.
4.) Stick in the mic for 12 minutes. (add or minus one or two depending on size.)
5.) Be careful when taking it out of the mic is will be very hot.
6.) Cut it in half length wise.
7.) Scoop out the middle part with the seeds.
8.) Use a fork to scrap out the inside.


Simple, right? :)

I added some frozen mixed veggies, which I cooked in the mic. I flavored with butter, pepper, and a little bit of salt.

Yams, Yams, Yams

Yams have become one of my favorite vegetables, its only about 20% starch, so its a veggie in my book. I have not been impressed by the selection of "fresh" yams at my local grocery store, but I found these little guys. Micro-bakers! Best invention ever! Quick and easy! Just pop it in the mic for 7 minutes and you have yourself a perfectly baked yam.


Dinner was packed with a lot of veggies. I popped some frozen mixed veggies on the mic, which consisted of broccoli, carrots, and yellow carrots, which for the longest time I thought was yellow squash! Either way they are pretty tasty.


I also had a side of broccoli slaw, which consists of red cabbage, carrots, and raw broccoli. I added red vinegar and gluten-free ranch to the slaw. I love red vinegar and ranch together. It is the best combination. To drink I had a nice refreshing glass of water.

Day THREE

February 18, 2010

Today is a new day. After not completing any of my happiness projects yesterday, I have decided to do them this weekend in addition to the ones I have yet to plan. I have a few ideas in the works, just nothing decided.

I woke up early at 5am. Since I did not have to actually get ready for work until 6, I had plans of blogging, reading or exercising. I just went back to bed. I don’t know why I can’t get motivated lately.

My new ‘happiness project’ is to lose 10 pounds. For some reason I get to a weight and I tell myself this is as low as I can go, my body won’t let me lose the weight, so why bother. The last ‘lowest’ weight my body would let me go was 10 pounds ago. So I have decided to challenge myself and lose another 10 pounds. After that is accomplished, I will really be as low as I can go for my body type. I am a tall girl, 5’9 and there is a point of being too skinny. I am very healthy by the way, just had my physical last week.

I know that losing weight isn’t something that a lot of people will agree will bring me happiness. I know that losing weight alone won’t make you happier, you need to make other changes. It is not about the losing weight for me, yes I want to get rid of this last 10 pounds, but MY Happiness Project is about doing things that I put off or make excuses for not doing or competing. If I have an hour to drive to the mall, shop and spend money, I have time to workout, clean-out my junk drawer, closet ect.

What MY Happiness Project is all about is: Things that do not cost money, but will bring me lasting happiness.

Tonight is girl’s night. Every Thursday we make a conscious effort to have girl’s night. This can be expensive, usually a $20 night at least. I allow myself to attend this outing every week because even though it is expensive, almost half of what I spend on groceries a week. I know that it is good for me mentally, to be with girl friends and talk about problems, concerns, or just laugh hysterically. I told my BFF that this week I was feeling selfish, so it will be just her and I going to dinner, usually we invite a lot of girls and 6 or more usually show up. We are going to Sweet Tomatoes. Which is difficult for me to eat there because of the gluten, sometimes I get sick (which consists of a headache and sometimes stomach issues) and sometimes I am totally fine. So today I am feeling brave.

My Happiness Project for today I completed was putting the money I had left in my bank account as of last night right before I got paid towards my credit card. I don’t have a lot of debt; just a little bit of nagging that I allow myself to keep. I will do this every other paycheck in addition to my monthly payments until the balance is $0.00 read that $0.00!

Foods for the day:

Gluten free Chex and Glutino Pretzel stick (which are amazing)

Celestial Acai Mango Zinger Caffeine free tea

Salad which consisted of romaine lettuce, feta, cranberries, cucumbers, carrots, and walnuts from Pie Zanos.

Glutino Sans Gluten Free Wild berry Baies savages

Dinner will be lots of delicious goodness at Sweet Tomatoes

Frozen Yogurt

Day TWO: Happiness Project

February 17, 2010

Day 2 of my happiness project. I have so many ideas of what I want to do that I have to write them all down. I really need to take it a little at a time because I am a perfectionist. This means I will want to do them all in one day, not be able to and give up.

Today I will go to home depot after work. I am going to have them re-key the lock on my garage door to fit the rest of the locks and buy filters. I don’t know why I always put off going to home depot. I think because it is on the right side of the freeway, in the middle of the shopping center and just not really convenient.

I did my blood work this morning; it was the fasting kind so I was there by 7am. I put it off for a couple of days. I am glad that I finally did it. Now the wait to make sure I am healthy.

Foods for the day:
Venti Chai from Starbucks with n/f milk
2 Steak Taco plate from Rubio’s, with Black beans instead of pinto
Celestial Chai Tea Honey Vanilla

Left over steak, black bean, Colby Jack and brown rice tortilla burro

I did no exercise and I did not complete my happiness project for the day. I was disappointed in myself. I didn’t read any of the book either.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Day One My Happiness Project

Today was my first day of my happiness project. I had to order the book because both of the Barnes and Nobles near me were sold out; it came in today (only took a day!) so I went and picked it up. My first project was to put the leopard dishes in the yard sale pile and pull the good China out of the China cabinet and put them in the cabinet for everyday use.

I bought new silverware about a year ago and instead of getting rid of the old silverware I kept it. Last night the old silverware went in the yard sale pile too.

I felt better, a little excited, a little anxious. I worry about breaking one of the good China or running out of silverware. What good is the China if we don’t enjoy it? How long does it really take to clean a piece of silverware if we run out?

I finally wrote thank you cards from my birthday, 3 weeks later! I also cleaned the house. Not a deep cleaning, but dusted and vacuumed and washed the pet bedding. I was very productive.

Foods for the day:

Glutino Sans Gluten Free Wild berry Baies savages

Green Tea, Stash Pomegranate and raspberry (2 bags)

Sweet and Savory Trail mix from TJ’s

Carrots

Dried Green beans from TJ’s

Egg Burro with 1 egg, 1 egg white, Colby Jack cheese, and a gluten/wheat free brown rice tortilla.

Ginger Tea, Yogi

Today I donated blood. 2 hours before I went I made a egg, steak, and cheese burro with Trader Joe's Wheat free, Gluten Free Brown Rice Tortillas and had a glass of milk. Before
you donate blood, it is important to drink lots of water, get a good nights rest and eat a good meal. My donation was quick, took 11 minutes, I have been as quick as 8 minutes before.

I donate blood because it doesn't cost me anything and it is a way to give back. I potentially saved 4 lives today. Since I am a gold donor they really want me to donate platelets.

In this process they take the blood out, separate the platelets and put back in what is left over, you can donate 2x as much. It take a bit longer as regular whole blood donation. They keep calling to see if I will donate platelets. I would love to, but I can't. The thought of them taking it out and putting it back in grosses me out like no other! Before I started donating blood, my doctors office would take blood with a baby needle when they needed samples. So I feel like I have come a looong way and don't plan on donating platelets. I finally explained this to them and they have now made a note in my records to show I was not comfortable with this.

My parents are coming to spend the weekend with me next weekend. My mom and I are going to have a garage sale while my dad fixes a few things around the house. Today, before I go donate blood I am going to work on going through everything I have then this afternoon my plan is to price! This is going to be quite a task.

Gluten-Free Steak Caesar Salad

I am going to donate blood today and need all the iron I can muster. Last night I decided to make a gluten-free steak caesar salad with lemons. I am addicted to Newman's Own creamy caesar salad dressing. I love Newman's Own products because they have a very helpful allergen information on there website. I went to the grocery store after work to discover that steak was on sale! I prepared my steak for grilling, this consisted stabbing, peppering heavily, and a pinch of salt. I grilled on medium for 12 minutes, then flipped and grilled for 7 minutes, for a gorgeous medium- well steak. I had the steak on top of chopped romaine lettuce which I squeezed lemon on, drizzled the dressing over, added grated and shredded parmesan cheese and pepper. The salad was delightful.

1st Journal Entry: Plan A Party

I planned a party for myself, for my birthday. This is difficult for me because I fear that no on will come. I do not like to plan something and have it fail. Despite my fears I planned it and hoped for the best.

I decided to have it at a cute tea place that I have never been to. I invited all the girls from girl's night, and a few of my other friends that don't attend girls night. It was on a Sunday afternoon. My 4 very best friends were the ones that showed up. I was so happy. We had so much fun and laughed a lot.

I asked that no one bring presents, just a book or CD that they had enjoyed. We traded books. I ended up with Everyone Worth Knowing by Lauren Weisberger.

The lunch was a success in my eyes. I was so pleased with who joined me in celebrating.

Big 27!!!

I was not looking forward to celebrating my 27th birthday... why I am not sure. I didn't want to go out to dinner or anything. We celebrated by having take out and watching movies at home! I had Pei Wei, Gluten-Free Pei Wei Spicy chicken with brown rice. I love having a glass of wine with this chicken, it taste so yummy. We got to watch 2 girlie movies, which is a rarity in this house. Then I had a gluten-free chocolate cupcake. It was so good. I haven't had a cupcake in sooo long i can't even remember. It turned out to be a great birthday after all.

Kaua'i Vacation

I recently went to Kauai for vacation. My first real adult vacation, meaning I paid for everything. Because I eat gluten-free, I knew that this was going to be a challenge. I went with a friend who is very understanding which helped a lot. I packed some of my own foods microwavable popcorn, larabars, and glutino breakfast bars. I did my research for the trip on place to see and restaurants to go prior to the trip.

I read about Sweet Marie's on Gluten Free Mom's blog. I could not wait to try a muffin, I have not had a muffin in so long, I can not even remember. After making a list of activities and restaurants we were off to our adventure after flying 2400 miles over ocean we arrived and were on our way to Sweet Marie's. She definitely makes the most amazing muffins. I had a white chocolate chip banana muffin. My friend who does not live gluten free even loved the baked goods, she had the coffee cake, which I tried and was absolutely divine. We also bought chocolate chip and snicker-doodle cookies to snack on. Not only were the baked good amazing, so was the coffee. Marie was very sweet, and very helpful recommending restaurants that would be gluten free friendly.

I would love to go back just for the muffins. She will send baking mixes to the main land. I have not ordered yet, but I will. Yummy!

2010 Has Arrived!

2009 made me more aware of myself, what I am capable of and an idea of what I want out of life. I have always known where I am (most of the time) and where I wanted to end up… the in between is what I have struggled with most of my life. The getting to where I want to end up I suppose.

I discovered that I can remain and even better the person I am in a relationship. Some may think that sounds silly, unless they have had a past like mine. I have always either strived to be someone they wanted me to be or I thought that they wanted me to be or they have made me into someone I didn’t want to be and they didn’t want either. I found myself saying that’s who I want to be or that’s not me. I have often felt in the past that I need that grace period of being single to get back to who I was before they came into my life or who I wanted to be after they were gone. I dated a guy on and off for 6 years, I always said they we just didn’t know how to grow together.

This year, I discovered if I remain who I am that special someone will love me anyways. They decided to date me when I was me single on my own. I feel I have even become a better person. I pushed myself to be better and surprised myself along the way. It makes me want to be with him more because I like who I am with him.

So who am I… I am a caring, thoughtful, genuine person, who trusts and allows her heart to be worn on her sleeve, who will go above and beyond to make someone else’s life better. Who has her own style and doesn’t need to try to be something she is not. What I have come to find out about my <3,>

No one lives their life for you, so you don’t have to live your life for someone else.

I struggle with comparing how my life is to how my love life is. I know that is not what completes a person, in this society though, it is what defines you.

I have blogged a bit in the past and have a list of topics I would like to blog about. I think about numerous topics. I want to do it all; focusing on just one is hard for me because I want to be good at everything. I think what if I choose exercise and I fail miserably? I am a perfectionist, a recent realization for myself, although not to my friends, co-workers or family.

I should have know, I have always attributed my perfectionism to something else, OCD or anal-retentive. What sets me apart from those and makes me a perfectionist is its all or nothing for me. I put my whole heart into something and complete to perfection or I do not do it at all. Example: Cleaning the house, I am very particular when it comes to cleaning the house. If I can not accomplish all tasks that go along with cleaning the house to perfection, then I do not do it.

When I first thought about New Years Resolutions for 2010, I wrote down:

1.) Do not reward myself before earning it.

When I told my mother this her response was “Don’t be so hard on yourself.” I immediately thought of all the times I had rewarded myself for things I did not deserve. Like that bowl of ice cream when I had not worked-out that day, or that week for that matter. The 2 hours of T.V. I watched instead of cleaning the house or finishing the work I had brought home. That mani and pedi when I did not do anything substantial to deserve pampering.

Because I am a little ADD when it comes to blogging. I get sooo excited when I try to pin point what I want to focus on, I think of a millions things I want to blog about. Relationships, exercise, nutrition, cooking, home repair, book, movie and restaurant reviews, style, clothing, sports, money… one can see how I can not commit to blogging because I know I can’t do it all and have it all be perfect. Therefore I don’t do it. I have done a few, but loose interest because I can’t do it all.

2010 will be a year full of discovery. In order for me to focus, I have decided to blog journal entries for the next 3 months. This will enable me to focus on what I really like to write about. As with the blogging topics, I have a hard time focusing on what to journal about so I have invested in a book SKINNY BITCHIN’ by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin. In this amazing book, they have journal topics to write about and motivational quotes to ponder through out the day.

Along with these journal entries, I will incorporate other topics that I would like to write about. I hope to keep a food and exercise journal as well. The purpose of this is to work life out on paper. You are your own greatest teacher and your own worst enemy. I will pin point both throughout the year and hope have many AHHH HAAAA moments and lessons learned.

I recently watched the movie YES MAN. This year I will be a YES Woman… I rarely say yes to opportunities. When my friends invite me out, I always decline, or I say yes and I cancel. I would call myself a home-body, a creature of habit. I am sure that this is once again my personal diagnosis and there is really something else that keeps me home and from enjoying opportunities. My hope is that this year, I will discover myself and take more adventures and say YES!

My first big YES of the New Year is a vacation to Hawaii. Even though I have had a few opportunities to back out, I have not let myself and I am really proud of myself for that. I leave in 10 days. I am very excited, nervous about leaving my dog and house in someone else hands, the money I am spending because I did not “save-up” (another weakness I need to work on) missing work and being out of my realm. I have not taken this sort of vacation ever. I am going with one of my best friends.

For the first time in probably my life, I am not worried about having to be in a bathing suit, not because I won’t know anyone there or ever see them again, but because I am the skinniest I have ever been in my adult life, college, high school and jr. high life for that matter. I of course would like to be more toned and a few pound lighter, for the most part I am pretty okay with being in a bathing suit.

My theory on eating: I eat to live, not live to eat. About 9 months ago I self-diagnosed myself with gluten and wheat intolerance. I have been gluten and wheat free every since. It truly has changed my life, for the better. I was never a big eater of bread anyways so it isn’t very hard for me. I do not miss it all. The hard part is the social aspect of it. Eating is such a huge social event in our society, that when you can not indulge in what other are you are judge for it, or maybe they are really judging themselves, because when you decline that piece of cake and they are on their 2^nd they feel bad so they want you to indulge as well.

The same things goes for drinking, drinkers want to surround themselves with other drinkers. That way they don’t feel bad for themselves or feel like you are judging them. I do not drink with an exception of a glass of wine here or there. Many of my friends still go out to the bars every weekend. I rarely go out with them. My reasons for not attending this social gather are: I don’t drink, so time doesn’t fly by for me like it does them, I am still the painfully shy person I was when I walked in the door, I was up at 5am to go to work and I enjoying getting up early on Saturdays and Sundays to do some kind of outdoor exercise, either hiking or bike riding.

Eating wise to drop a size…

I am a firm believer in the more lean protein you eat, the leaner you will be because you are fueling your muscles. I believe that you can eat as many veggies (frozen or fresh) you possibly can and it will only be better for you. Eat fruits sparingly, treat them like sweets, eat them a few hours after eating and they will aid in digestion and keeping hunger at bay. These are not scientific findings; these are real things that I do to keep slim. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy a good pint of ice cream, yes I said pint, just like every other girl, I behave all the time so I can be bad some of the time.

I have always had to work for what I have. Whether it was grades or a fit body, nothing comes naturally for me. I have belonged to a gym since I was 12. I try to work out every day, lately I have been very busy with work and just collapse when I get home and sleep as long as I can. It has been a very long time since I have had an exercise routine, something that I do everyday. I am going to change that this year. I will be waking up at 5:30am to do the elliptical for 30 minutes. After a few weeks, or a few months, I will increase this to 1 hour. As I write I am thinking of the past year, I have not been getting up early because I feel that 30 minutes isn’t enough and I know I can do an hour before work, so because it can not be what I see as perfection, I choose not to work out in the morning. This was the wrong thinking! A little is always better then none at all. Getting back to the work out plan, I will then walk my dog, if day light permits, then do 30 minutes of the elliptical before making dinner. After a few months I will increase this to 1 hour.

Some may think that this sounds crazy. I want to be in good shape and I like they way my body looks and feels when I am in shape. Nothing tasks as good as skinny feels, not sure who said that, I completely agree though.

Interesting facts about me…

I leave change in the vending machine coin return just incase someone doesn’t have enough change, I flip coins I see on the ground to heads so the person who finds it will have good luck, I try not to use the word but because it cancels out what was said prior to using but and makes what is said after non existent. I would rather a smile was on somebody else face than my own. (maybe I am a people pleaser?)